more tips on getting by
without Italian

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3. show some emotion

Our last tip for now, (but use it VERY prudently) - Only in emergencies like being attacked or mugged, or if you really think that someone is giving you a hard time, and if you KNOW and are confident that you are unquestionably and legally in the right, then GET REALLY ANGRY and shout at them. DO NOT THREATEN OR INTIMIDATE. Don't get physical. Just let them know you're angry. We are not telling you to break the law here. Just shout. This really unsettles the Italians, as they commonly think that they alone have the world monopoly on dramatic anger tantrums; They think that English and Americans are mild-mannered, so if you shock them against this pre-conception by really raising the roof, you'll catch them off guard and they may back down. They'll think you're crazy, but it's worth it if it will help you get out of a situation where you're cornered in a language you don't understand and feel you might be getting ripped off somehow. DON'T use violence of course - Just your voice, and ONLY if you're really sure you're legally in the right or have been unquestionably badly or discourteously treated in some way. Don't wave your arms about like an Italian - it's important not to find common ground, but rather to project an alien quality, which will worry them because they won't know how to culturally interface or negotiate with your anger, or how deep and potentially lethal it may go, so just use your voice, and they'll probably back off in the same way they'd back off from a Bengal Tiger with a toothache and a personality disorder. Don't use this tactic if the other guy is bigger than you. Don't use it if you seem to be outnumbered. Dont use it if you might be in the wrong or if your claim to be in the right is dubious or debateable. As I say, only use it if you are absolutely sure you're in the right (as in 'God's Ten Commandments right') and if it seems safe to do so. If it doesn't seem safe or prudent or right, then be careful as this behaviour could get you arrested, beaten up or thrown out of a restaurant or wherever in shame, or they might simply call the police. Yes, it may seem crazy, immature, childish, unwise etc for you to take this course of action. But in some cases, ask yourself this simple queston - What else are you going to do? Who're you gonna call? There isn't anybody. You'll know when that situation has arisen, but I pray it won't happen to you. Just look on it as a last-ditch defence mechanism, like cats wailing at each other first to avoid a fight, or those butterflies with wing-markings that pretend to be wasps to warn off birds that want to eat them.

A guy in Rome backed his car into my car one day and marked it - I got out and let him have it with a mild but loud verbal stream of English abuse. It turned out that the guy was a car-body repair man, and this incident had happened right outside his repair-shop. Without a word, he just went into his shop and came out with some cutting-compound and proceeded to rub his car's paint-streaks off my car. Obviously I felt really bad afterwards, as the guy was so sweet, but it worked - I got my car fixed for free. I'm a skinny little guy, so I know it was my words and not my physique that got the job done.

We're not recommending this as THE way to generally go about things - It's just a suggestion of something you might want to try if all else fails and if you personally feel threatened. It's best to call a policeman first before ever taking the law into your own hands in this way of course. But there may be times when, as a tourist on foreign soil and in a foreign language you feel vulnerable, and if there's no police in sight, you might wanna try the shouting tactic, but we accept no responsibility for the consequences if it turns out against you - Hey, it's a jungle out there folks...

If you're planning on living here, you'll sometimes find that you'll be ripped off because people here mistakenly think you're just a tourist here for just a few days and they'll never have to meet you again. So if you're coming to Rome for more than a couple of weeks it's important to stand firm on stuff like this and learn enough Italian to introduce yourself properly, chat to locals, tell them where you're living, try to make friends and get to know people. That way you'll avoid the need for heavy confrontations, as the locals will realise that you're not gonna go away next week and that you're serious and courteous about settling in and appreciating the local culture and language, and that they can't rip you off because if they do you'll be back in their shop next week with the local policeman who is probably your neighbour and you'll also tell other Italians what lousy service you had in that shop/restarant/cinema etc.

We'll add more tips to this section as they come to us, such as how to know when you are being insulted, so keep checking back.

Finally, if you're not into cheating and faking it, and would prefer to learn Italian properly, then take a look at Languagecourse.Net, a website which lists recognized and recommended Italian language schools in Rome, or for that matter, any language school in any city of the world.

Their site also rates the different schools, compares prices, locations facilities etc, lets you and other visitors and students evaluate the schools and tells you how you can enrol online with schools for language tuition in Rome. Click here to find out more, or email them.

For italian translation, click here. 

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